Impatience

1.      A guy sticks his head in the barber shop and asks, “How long before I can get a haircut?” The barber looks around the shop and says, “About two hours.” The guy leaves. A few days later, the same guy sticks his head in the door and asks, “How long before I get a haircut?” The barber looks around the shop full of customers and says, “About two hours.” The guy leaves. A week later, the same guy sticks his head in the shop and asks, “How long before I can get a haircut?” The barber looks around the shop an says, “About an hour and half.” The guy leaves. The barber looks over at a friend in the shop and says, “Hey Bill, follow that guy and see where he goes.” In a little while, Bill comes back into the shop laughing hysterically. The barber asks, “Bill, where did he go when he left here?” Bill looks up and says, “To your house…”

2. A farmer and His brand new bride were riding home from the chapel in a wagon pulled by a team of horses, when the older horse stumbled. The farmer said, “That`s once.” A little further along, the poor old horse stumbled again. The farmer said, “That`s twice.” After a little while the poor old horse stumbled again. The farmer didn`t say anything, but reached under the seat, pulled out a shotgun and shot the horse. His brand new bride scolded him, “That was an awful thing to do!” The farmer said, “That`s once.” Many people don’t have patience anymore.

3.    After waiting more than an hour and a half for her date, the young lady decided she’d been stood up. Exasperated, she changed from her dinner dress into pajamas and slippers, fixed some popcorn and resigned herself to an evening of TV. No sooner had she flopped down in front of the TV than her doorbell rang. There stood her date. He took one look at her and gasped, “I’m two hours late, and you’re still not ready?”

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